Friday 16 July 2010

After all that this is what I’ve found…

Right I thought I might do something a little more interesting than the short post I wrote earlier, so feel free to get bored and close the screen at anytime.

My brother comes back from Germany today, hopefully he has a present for me hahahaaa, I’m such a nice sister oh yeah he made it back into the country safely and managed to send an SOS text to my mum, he face was a picture after I told her he was probably stuck up a mountain somewhere after he fell of their chair lift ride, shame my sister managed to talk some sense into her to be honest.

I’m going to have a really busy day tomorrow, shopping first thing to get shed loads of sweets for the coach and for camp plus to get the stuff I forgot to get. Then we’re all heading over to my Aunty and Uncles to talk about our holiday which starts two weeks tomorrow.

Scott said he would have his phone sorted this morning but as I guessed it looks like he hasn’t which means now for a month we probably won’t be talking, I mean for a relationship to survive over distance is one thing but to not talk for a whole month is a completely different ball game.

I am so bored it’s insane being in this house 24/7 is driving me nuts, so can’t wait for camp now, even if it means not being able to talk to Scott for a week which doesn’t really matter now seeing as he doesn’t have a phone that works anymore. I was seriously contemplating taking Louis up on his cinema offer just to get out of the house, but thought I would be safer staying in the house seeing as he has this thing where he can’t move on and seriously if there was something I could change about my past he would be it. Oh well everyone makes mistakes.

My only problem at the moment is the way Scott is acting at the moment reminds me of the whole ‘Pearl situation’ and how he changed towards me when all of that happened. Needless to say that’s a time I don’t want to be reminded about.

We are having a BBQ tonight and I’m starving so it had better hurry up.

BBQ is now eaten and I am going to finish this nice long rambling blog.

I feel kind of guilty on the Louis front because on one thing, when me and Scott where over and breaking up and getting back together like 4 months ago that he stood a chance if he sorted himself out and learnt what being in a relationship meant well I didn’t hear off of him till about a week ago, when I got a text explaining he had sorted himself out that’s why he hadn’t spoken to me and I told him it was too late blah blah blaah the rest is history seeing as I’m still with Scott. I don’t like being used so I won’t put myself through it again, plus I thought I had something really good with Scott until the last few days, since he’s being really weird with me again. Apparently I deserve better and he doesn’t realise that he’s got a really good thing, according to one of my mates but I told them he’s probably going through something and doesn’t want to talk about it or something, but then they made a good point that he should be able to tell me everything., oh well, we’ll see won’t we.

I’ve given up getting stressed out over everything now and in a way that includes Scott I’m getting fed up with the whole hot and cold thing, and all the mixed messages, so I’m just going to let it go now and in a result I’ve had a pretty good day.

I’m into rap, probably mentioned it before in here somewhere, along with other types of music but that’s going off the point, I write rap lyrics, I’m a lyricist. So I’m working on recording some stuff so I thought the best way to get into it is to do some remixes of some existing songs and I’m working on some stuff at the moment which is what I’ve been doing pretty much all day. It’s kind of good because it lets me reflect on things without thinking too much about them, plus it gets things out of my head and down onto paper a safe distance away from my brain and over thinking them. I don’t only write rap lyrics I have written songs too but I can’t sing so they generally stay on paper and never get any further.

I’m hoping to buy a new camera soon something decent that will do video and pictures; hopefully I’ll get in time for my family holiday.

I think today I have successfully worked my way through the whole of Usher’s, Ne-Yo’s and Chris Brown’s videos on YouTube, a day well spent in my mind. But I have discovered old school R&B that is something people should check out, some really good sounds. But seriously I don’t think the whole Rihanna thing should ruin Chris Brown’s career yeah he did something wrong but I mean if that happened to a normal person it wouldn’t affect their professional life it’d stay in their personal life but I guess that’s the problem with being famous.

I went for a run today and almost died, can’t believe how unfit I am. I’ll be going again tomorrow, the joys of exercise.

...and now my little finger is the size of a house (there was no exaggeration at all) << and that wasn’t sarcasm, well maybe it was but still it hurts, I don’t recommend trapping your finger in a window it’s not fun and in extreme cases it starts bleeding five minutes after the incident in question.

Now we are gaining our years worth of rain I wonder is summer will be over now, I love the British summer, I mean why would you want to be anywhere else?

Laterz xo

Love you xxxx

 

P.s I hope what this Sophie girl is saying isn’t true but it looks like it might be so I’m not being messed around anymore, Scott you need to start telling me the truth, I’ve believed you once, I’ve believed you twice, three times that can’t just be rumours can it? Oh yeah and you better speak to me before tomorrow night or you won’t be liking the results of my actions. Actually I might be doing you a favour seeing as your with some many people I could narrow the choice for you a little bit.

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