Today has been so good, went to London for a college trip, well actually it was to see parliament for politics. The best part as always the bus and the lunch with Shannen, Roisin & Tom, it was soooo funny, especially the game of eye spy, nothing could top that and Tom’s comments all around London, definitely a day to remember.
Got to do a lot of thinking over the next few days, quite a few decisions to make and a few people to get out of my life again.
Later xo
Crap day, everything seems really bad at the moment, I just want to sleep.
All everyone wants to do is talk about what my sister is doing at uni, I’m not being funny and I know I’m really selfish but I’ve just started college it’d be nice for people to pay a little bit of interest to me and not always expect me to be ‘just like my sister’.
Got rid of my ex again for the time being.
Work with a really cool awesome guy in media today, I don’t know his name though, but he was a laugh, an upside to the day.
Only two lessons tomorrow, the rest of the day is frees.
I established how to get to college on the bus today, tomorrow I have to work out how to get home on it, should be interesting I might just walk so I don’t have to face my parents as soon.
Laterz xo
Friday I had football training which resulted in my knee injury coming back and gaining an ankle injury. I’m considering quitting permanently because of all the injuries I’m getting. The only major thing that has happened all day. Then at night everything happens...
Feeling like I haven’t spoken to Scott at all in ages, so I’m ready for a night to just sit and talk, but then he has to go out and umm well we don’t, he doesn’t reply to my texts and I’m lef tot wonder what I’m supposed to of done.
Out of the blue I get a text from my obsessive ex, Louis, not what I need when Scott suddenly stops talking to me for no reason, he tries to persuade me to go with him for dinner one night and prove that he’s changed, blah blah blah and all of that, I don’t buy it, added to being really worried about what’s happening with Scott I get really annoyed.
Saturday my sister is leaving for university, Bournemouth to be exact, I’m going to be so close to Scott and I haven’t even spoken to him since 8pm last night, not promising to be honest especially as I’ve woken up with loads of texts from Louis, not what I need.
3 hours in the car and I decide to go to sleep, wake up about half an hour later and I have a text from Scott, his phone broke, over reacting maybe, but I’m worried about losing him, and not talking to him for so long makes me really worried, and I know it’s usually over nothing but I can’t help it.
It feels so weird being so close to Scott for once but not actually seeing him. it’s times like these when I realise how much I actually miss him and having a boyfriend that I can just go see.
After a walk along Bournemouth beach we can finally go take my sister’s stuff to her room and help her unpack. When we finally leave i say to Scott I wish I could have seen him, he spent all his money on a new phone and some trainers which are more important than me (I’m joking).
I’m absolutely shattered and am in need of my bed. BUT I’ve fallen in love with Bournemouth and I want to move there.
Sunday I have so much college work to get through because I didn’t do any yesterday, by the time I finally settle down to do it after talking to Scott and my sister, I decide to go to the shop and see how my ankle is after it hurting so badly yesterday. I’ve discovered it still hurts, definitely not a good sign. Louis tries some more persuasion tactics again. And I haven’t spoken to Scott very much today , again, but we have a long distance relationship what do I expect.
I miss him, so so much, and I doubt we’ll be talking much the next few days because I have so much college stuff to get done. Plus I’m getting stressed out by everything and everyone.
Hopefully in half term I’ll get to see him because me and my whole family are going to go down to Bournemouth because it’s my sister’s birthday straight after it so hopefully me and Scott can see each other then at some point too.
My ankle kills.
When Scott’s with his mates he generally doesn’t talk to me, and there’s other times when he stops talking to me too, so I’m trying to get my college work done now while he’s with them so I don’t get annoyed because he won’t talk to me, I know that sounds stupid and really immature.
Louis is really winding me up saying how he’s changed and really wants another chances, but I can’t give him another one, loads of people say I should because it’s not as if I see Scott anyway so it wouldn’t make much difference, but it would make a difference to me.
It’s heading towards that point of the year, when my whole family become unbearable because of what happened a few years ago.
I love how people keep telling me I shouldn’t be with Scott because all of a sudden Louis is interested in me again. I don’t care what they say I have my own mind. But I am starting to get annoyed with the whole Scott going quiet on me at times because he never used to do it apart from the first time we were together and he wanted to be with someone else, Pearl. Hence why I was worried on Friday night/ Saturday morning.
I hate having a long distance relationship, yeah we can talk but I miss the simple things like kissing, and holding each other, being able to go out together, and just spending time together. But we have to deal with it; just at times it feels like it’s too much, and one of those times is now.
Why is it when I start college I have a lot more interest from guys and my ex’s are all of a sudden interested again, shame I’m not interested in them really.
Laterz xo
Well I haven’t written in a few days, they’ve been pretty crazy.
I’m meeting loads and loads of people which is great and getting to know other people even better. The work has increased by like a zillion and I’m starting to see a people’s other sides. Things get bitchy at college, really bitchy.
We lost our first football match, I don’t think I’ve made it onto the first team and I’ve managed to pick up another injury... GREAT!
So much stuff going on at the moment.
Had a good lunch with Lizzie, Cat and Shannen, it was really funny.
Business was funny with Zoe.
Media was GREAT, I loved it even if I was stuck in a group with the tallest person EVER, I mean he seriously was like three times my head (maybe a slight exaggeration)
ICT was good with Joe, he’s really funny, Fran is pretty call and Kirsty is awesome.
I miss having a boyfriend I can spend all my time with, especially now that I have a lot of spare time and just being able to spend time with him whenever we want, it’s really getting to me at the moment. The simple things like just being together that most people get. Add in a couple of people who like to be involved in everything then your head messes up a bit...
My sister’s off to uni on Saturday a majorly long journey to Bournemouth... fuuun...NOT
I need sleep, too much shit to be thinking about at the moment, people, stuff…..
I love this song at the moment:
And this one is pretty awesome too:
I’m trying to get back into playing my guitar but it’s proving to be quite hard with college at the moment.
Laterz xo
Induction days of college are over, but it has been really good! I start my proper timetable on Monday which should be good, I’ve got quite a few free lessons so I should be able to do most of my work in college and I finish early on Mondays and Fridays!
There was some girl in politics today, who seemed to know everything, plus she only buys her stuff that’s made in England and is a vegetarian because she lives on a farm... very confusing person.
I feel so tired now though, I haven’t had to pay that much attention to anything the last few months but I’ve worked so hard to get where I am and I’ve still got a way to go but I’m going to prove everyone who has doubted me wrong.
I’m actually looking forward to putting everything into the next two years.
The other good thing about our tutor group is all the girls and guys get on, no one is really up themselves, and there’s been no major bitching yet!
Now for a weekend of relaxing before everything really kicks off.
Laterz xo
Love you xxxx
I can’t believe I wasn’t looking forward to college, I love it induction day number one is over, and met tons of new people had a laugh with peoples, played a drum and had actually a good time. My new media teacher is wicked, my ICT teacher seems okay and my tutor seems pretty cool too. So all in all today went really well.
I’m actually really glad that I’m going to college so pulling out would have been stupid!
I’m even looking forward to going tomorrow even though I did get homework today which was reading like a zillion pages in out ICT textbooks (well a zillion is a slight exaggeration) but it is boring the only part of today that I didn’t like.
Hopefully I’ll get to talk to Scott at some point tonight.
I’m actually looking forward to the next two years!
So my fresh start is going well, might not last for long but for the time being I’m going to enjoy being happy and meeting all these new people. Oh yeah my tutor group is a laugh too which is a bonus!
Laterz xo
Love you xxxx
I haven’t blogged for a while...
I’ve had my first training session with my college team, it was good, although I did realise how unfit I am! So I’ve got to work on that.
I’ve been writing again and one a competition on the writing website I post my poems on, which was pretty cool!
I’ve got college tomorrow, should be fun especially as some of the football team will be in some of my classes!
Me and Scott are pretty good at the moment ish. Well actually it’s a bit… but it should be okay.
I’m quite into Honor Society at the moment :)
Later xo
Love you xxxx
Scott’s birthday, I wish I could be with him… hopefully he liked his presents!
Football training for the first time in like three years tomorrow, I'm going to DIE.
More watching of DVDs and eating ice cream today, so not really much else to say.
Laterz xo
Love you so much baby, you mean the world to me xxxx
Spoken to loads of people that I haven’t spoken to in ages.
Might be, hopefully, should be seeing Scott next week (fingers crossed)
Got football training on Monday for an hour and a half, if I play well then I should get into the team for the first match!
Not much else to say really.
Laterz xo
Love you xxxxx
Got some new football boots today, in WHITE, I know they won’t stay that colour for long but they do look pretty cool, two more hats to add to my collection, a bag for college and a couple of dvds to watch.
Got rid of my ex finally, no I didn’t kill him yes I did just tell him wear to go. Can’t be asked with people like that anymore, college is going to be my fresh start so I need to start making it exactly that.
I seriously love Lindsay Lohan’s music!
I’m working on some editing of some new videos, don’t know what yet but I’ll find something, might make my own music video for a song or something, need to practice for media next year, got loads of notes still to read too...
My time on the computer is being limited again due to the headaches.
We’re having most probably our last BBQ of the summer, exciting I know.
Not much else to say really.
Laterz xo
Love you xxxx
I posted Scott’s present today, so he should get it tomorrow or Saturday, things between us seem odd again at the moment. But that song up their reminds me of us.
I nearly fainted last night, because of the headaches and everything, wasn’t fun.
I’m going to watch waterloo road tonight then go to bed early again, then tomorrow I'm going to go for a run to clear my head.
Laterz xo
Love you xxxx
My boyfriend has officially made me poor, I’m joking, but I have spent loads of money in the last few days, Scott’s birthday present has definitely been the most I have spent over the last few days, especially as part of it was bought in the uber cool shop which sells amazingly cool stuff and i can’t say anything more than that because he will probably read this.
Major issues in being able to send Scott’s presents, I was originally going to go to my college enrolment and then post his present but the shop closed before i got there so I'm posting it tomorrow which means he should definitely get it on Friday!
Waterloo Road is back tonight! So this post is filling the time till that's on as I don’t have Scott to talk to.
I have a migraine so looking at the computer screen probably isn’t the best idea but i felt like writing.
I really wish I was able to give Scott his present in person but that won’t be possible, one of the many reasons why I hate us having the distance. There are quite a few other reasons too but I don’t think about those too much because of how good are relationship is even with the distance, yes we argue sometimes (more me than him) but things are really good at the moment, I just wish I could see him, I miss his hugs, and he makes me feel safe and is just really amazing and does loads of cute things.
I’ve got my college ID card and I look really weird in the picture on it, my college planner is rubbish so I’m glad I’ve got a proper diary to use.
It was so funny when we went to the burger king in the hospital today (the hospital is right next door to my college), me, George, Mica, and Milly all had such a laugh! I can’t wait till we’re back properly I’ve missed everyone.
Everything seems to be going good for once, and I’m really happy.
Laterz xo
Love you xxxx
