When You’re Mad

I won’t be able to talk to Scott till really late today, it’s really hard knowing I can’t talk to him, I feel really lost normally we talk virtually all day.

I’ve been filling my days drawing celebrity’s portraits because I haven’t got much else to do, and I’m getting better slowly.

I should be going shopping this weekend which means I will be getting Scott’s birthday present (well more than one most likely), college stuff, clothes, and more art stuff. I love shopping and I have my wages for it this time so I won’t be owing anyone anymore money! I can’t wait to get Scott’s present sorted though. Plus I’ve got to get some stuff for football training.

My ex is causing trouble... again, I mean it’s not really that hard to understand I don’t want to spend time with him because he tried to use me and I’ll reply to his texts to be polite but seriously asking me to go to London with him is taking it too far add that to some other stuff especially some of the comments he’s been making and he thinks he still stands a chance, seriously, does he not know when to stop.

Today is going is incredibly slowly, the result of not being able to talk to Scott.

I mean seriously I don’t why people can’t stop interfering in mine and Scott’s relationship, we’re happy why can’t they be. Scott makes me so happy, I just hate it when people can’t leave us alone and try getting inside my head or his, it’s like they like causing trouble. It’s our relationship not theirs why can’t they leave us alone?

It looks like I might be going to Bournemouth for a day soon, should be fun... well as fun as taking my sister to university can be. But that means I can re-do mine and my sisters bedroom.

Last night I stayed up late working stuff out in my head and I’m pretty sure I have everything sorted now and I know what I want, who I want, where I’m heading, and the past is the past I’m not going to let it cause any more trouble, it did enough damage at the time to do anymore now. Too many good things have been happening to focus on the bad stuff. I’ve got an incredible boyfriend, a fresh start coming up with college, I’m getting back into college, and things with my family are going great, not to mention my amazing friends and all the other opportunities I’ve got coming up. It’s time to focus on the future and not what has happened coz I can’t change that.

I can’t believe Scott said it was cute when I get annoyed the other night...

I do know that I’m lucky to have him though, it is hard with the distance, and I can’t say it’s not. But he takes so much from me and I feel so bad about that, I have had ago at him so much lately, and he’s stuck by me, I can’t thank him enough for what he’s done for me the past couple of weeks, he has been really amazing, and kept me smiling when things have got really hard, so I know he definitely deserves what I’m going to getting him for his birthday and hope’s he stops arguing about what I can and can’t spend on him. I’m so lucky to have someone as cute, funny, kind, and caring as him!

Laterz xo

Love you so much baby xxxx