I'd rather have the one who holds my heart

I can see this is going to be a bit of a ramble so feel free to STOP NOW!



"I'd Rather"

I thought sometime alone
was what we really needed
you said this time would hurt more than it helps
but I couldn't see that
I thought it was the end
of a beautiful story
and so I left the one I loved at home to be alone (alone)
and I tried to find
out if this one thing is true
that I'm nothing without you
I know better now
and I've had a change of heart

I'd rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else
I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself
I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
whoo-oo-oo-oo yeah

And then I met someone
and thought she could replace you
we got a long just fine
we wasted time because she was not you
we had a lot of fun
though we knew we were faking
love was not impressed with our connection built on lies, all lies
so I'm here cause I found this one thing is true
that I'm nothing without you
I know better now
and I've had a change of heart

I'd rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else
I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself
I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
who holds my heart

I can't blame you if you turn away from me, like I've done you,
I can only prove the things I say with time,
please be mine,

I'd rather have bad times with (please be mine) you,
than good times with someone else (I know)
I'd rather be beside you in a storm (anytime),
than safe and warm by myself (so sure baby)
I'd rather have hard times to gether,
than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart (my heart)

I'd rather have bad times with you (surely),
than good times with someone else (surely)
I'd rather be beside you in a storm (oh yeah),
than safe and warm by myself (all by myself)
I'd rather have hard times together,
than to have it easy apart (you know it)
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart

I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
whoooo.....who holds my heart

The lyrics incase you can't be bothered to listen to it ;)

Well to be honest, i need to be honest with myself, and two guys.

I hopefully neither of them read this before i get to talk to them but if they do then, i can't really help that seeing as i usually write stuff here to make it clear in my head.

Scott,
-I'm sorry but right now, and i doubt that i ever will have feelings for you like i did before. I've probably seemed like thats what i wanted the last couple of days and it's unfair to lead you on. I need you as a friend, thats how we work best. YOU WILL find someone one day, just don't go looking for it, let that person come to you, i just don't think thats me, you a pearl didn't work out, (this is going to sound harsh but i did say in the beginning of this post that i was going to be honest) and tbh I'm glad you didn't work out, thats why we broke up because of her, that probably sounds really out of order but its the truth, and to tell you the truth, she seemed a bit of a cow (no intention to offend you) and you deserve better. Well i can't really say much for jazz but you couldn't really see things going terrible well with you and her if you were telling me you loved me, really... I don't want to lose you as a friend especially as we are so close but that's all we can be. You'll probably be pissed at me but you needed to know this.

Louis,
- Now this is when it get complicated really, it's unbelieveably (who cares if i spelt that word right) scary to think that i care about you this much. You were right i was dneying it everytime i told you i didn't but i guess everytime i was trying to get you out of my head, and everytime i thought i was something would remind me of you or us and then you would be the main thing i thought about. You've said you want me back, and well you know that i want that too, but things aren't going to be easy, firstly because of the people who will be against us being together (kind of obvious that one) and because there are somethings we'll need to work out. But if you want this as much as i do then we'll be able to sort it out. If you don't think we can or you are only saying the things i want to here then please walk away now, i can't have you messing with my head any more than you already have. I've said this to you before, i want to be there for you through the good an bad and not just walk away when things are hard, i mean what i say when i say i care about you, we're teenagers we don't really honestly know what love is but if this is it i'm not going to let it slip away from me, if i have a chance to see what real love is then i want to see what it's like. I really want this but only if it is for the right reasons.

Friends,
- You are going to make it hard, because i know what you think about everything thats gone on between me and louis, you haven't really kept that a secret to be honest :P but i want this and i want to be happy, so what you say won't change my oppinion of him, give him a chance, he's a good guy, you just haven't really managed to see that with whats happened.

Family,
- Well you pretty much are the same as the friends one but I really need you to take a step back on this one and take my judgement as the best one for this, i really do.


Anyways,

Laterz xx

Ps. maybe next time i'll be able to say that 'we' are together again, maybe not but what ever happens all you guys will find out ;)